Dying to Know
A relaxed, informative evening about death -
and the choices you might not realise you have
Overview of the first Dying to Know event
The first ‘Dying to Know’ took place in Pangbourne on 19 May 2026 - and around 85 people came along.
What began as a simple idea - to make conversations about death, dying, funerals and planning ahead a little easier - became a packed community evening of straightforward information, honest conversation and an extraordinary number of questions. And it very quickly became clear that one evening wasn’t going to be the end of it. ‘Dying to Know’ will be back - with further events and a developing roadshow to follow.
Meet the Speakers
You heared from a small group of experienced, local professionals who each see different parts of what happens when someone dies - from the practical, to the legal, to the deeply personal.
Between us, we shared insight, experience, and things most people aren’t told - helping you feel more informed, more prepared, and more confident about the choices available to you.
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Claire Vickery
Qualified, professional, award winning celebrant - All Your Love​​​
Grant Notman
Specialist Estate Preservation & Bloodline Protection - Kept Assets
Bruce Jones
Independent, Local Funeral Director - Tomalin & Son​
Louisa Nicoll
Registered nurse, speaker, patient advocate - guest speaker
Speaker Bios
All Your Love
Claire Vickery
Qualified professional celebrant
Claire creates deeply personal funeral ceremonies that reflect the life, character and story of the person at their centre. Working closely with families at one of the most difficult times in their lives, she brings calm guidance, thoughtful structure, and a genuine understanding of what matters most.
Through her work, she sees first-hand the questions people wish they’d asked sooner - and the difference it makes when they do.
Kept Assets
Grant Notman
Bloodline Adviser
Grant came into estate planning following the unexpected death of his brother - and the realisation that even paid-for advice can go badly wrong.
More than a decade on, he brings both professional expertise and lived experience to help others avoid the same pitfalls - making sure plans are clear, robust, and truly protect the people they’re meant to.
Tomalin & Son
Bruce Jones
Independent Funeral Director
With decades of experience supporting families through loss, Bruce offers a clear, honest perspective on what happens after someone dies - and the choices people often don’t realise they have.
Known for his straightforward approach and deep local knowledge, he helps families navigate practical decisions with care, clarity, and respect.
Campaigner
Louisa Nicoll
Registered Nurse, Speaker, and Patient Advocate
Louisa brings together clinical experience across community, hospice and hospital settings with personal insight following her husband’s illness and death.
She now focuses on helping people better understand their options, ask the right questions, and have conversations about care and future wishes before they become urgent - supporting more informed, confident decision-making at every stage.
What Happened
The aim was never to tell people how to plan for death.
It was to help them understand that they have choices - and to make some of the information surrounding death and dying easier to find before it is urgently needed.
Four speakers brought very different perspectives:
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Claire Vickery, funeral celebrant
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Bruce Jones, independent funeral director
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Grant Notman, specialist in estate preservation and bloodline protection
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Louisa Nicoll, registered nurse, speaker and patient advocate
Together, we explored what happens when someone dies, choices around funerals, planning for the future, care and advocacy - and some of the things people often only discover when they suddenly need to know them.
The audience then took over.
Questions came from the floor and through our anonymous question box, opening up conversations about everything from funeral choices and family wishes to practical planning and end-of-life care.
What We Learned
Perhaps the biggest finding from the evening was very simple:
People do want to talk about this stuff.
They just need the right place to do it.
A relaxed community setting, straightforward language and access to people from several different areas of experience created conversations that were practical, curious, sometimes moving - and frequently funny.
The questions and conversations also reinforced something all four speakers see in their own work:
there is a significant gap between the choices people actually have and the choices they know they have.
People wanted information.
They wanted to ask questions.
And, perhaps most importantly, they wanted the chance to have these conversations before they were having to make decisions in the middle of a crisis or bereavement.
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What Happens Next?
‘Dying to Know’ was designed as a community event.
The response has shown us that it can become much more than a single evening.
We are now looking at further events and opportunities to take the format into other communities - keeping the same principles at its heart:
No lectures.
No pressure.
No expectation that anyone makes a decision.
Just useful information, honest conversation and the opportunity to ask the questions we don't always know where to ask.
Details of future ‘Dying to Know’ events will be published here.
Why This Matters
When these moments arrive, they rarely come with much notice.
And whilst support is available, decisions are often made quickly - sometimes without a full understanding of the options.
‘Dying to Know’ exists to help change that.
To offer a little more clarity.
A little more confidence.
And perhaps a sense that there is more choice - and more flexibility - than people often realise.
A Final Note
You don’t need to prepare anything.
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You don’t need to make decisions.
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You don’t even need to stay until the end.
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Just come along, take a seat, and take from it whatever feels useful.
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That’s more than enough.
